Monday, January 10, 2005

Sucks to be them

Dear American Express:

I would have thought it was obvious, but I'll go on record now and say it directly -- I do not want an Oreck vacuum cleaner. I know you must find that hard to believe, but really, my lack of response to your seemingly weekly mailings should have tipped you off. It's been years, I'm sure, and yet I find that I still have absolutely no interest at all in an Oreck. I know, I know, you'll even send me the hand held unit. The thing is, I don't have all that many occasions when I need to pick up a stray bowling ball. OK, perhaps after that one wild party, sure, but there were only a few. I don't think the bowling alley even noticed they were missing. We managed to return them all within a couple weeks anyway. Almost all of them, anyway.

So yeah, please cease and desist with the onslaught of vacuum ads.

Your customer,
Larry Mac -- Member since 1980!


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I'm digging whatever is on my XM Radio, channel 45...

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